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[00:01:00] Hey, my friend, what's up? And welcome back to another episode of Do Life Big. I am so pumped to have you here today. Listen, I do apologize for not having an episode up the last few weeks. I just came back from a month long vacation up at our mountain home in North Carolina, and I had all good intentions of staying on track with work.
But then I decided, you know what? I need to disconnect, and sometimes you need to disconnect in order to reconnect and rejuvenate yourself. And it's something I literally never do. If you're someone like me, I'm sure you can relate where it's just like one thing to the next all the time. And I just really needed that time to just kind of reconnect, wake up in the morning, have my slow mornings with my coffee on the deck while I overlooked the stream and the mountains, sipping my hot coffee, which I cannot do in Florida here, as you can assume.
The reason why. And we had a great time. We came back, Sunday night, not too long ago here now, and we had a great time. We had some friends come up for the [00:02:00] week. We had my parents come up for the week. We had some alone time as well. We came home with a new unexpected abandoned cat that we found at one of our cabins.
So that was exciting and interesting. I swore I would never have another cat again because I've never really had a good one. Like they've always. I don't know, scratch the shit out of my furniture or bitten me when I try to touch them in a certain spot and they've just been, I dunno, they weren't really that great, but this cat is a whole new level.
She does not bite, hiss, scratch. She is so good. It's incredible. We named her mittens and she's so cute. The kids are so excited. We did that. We also came home with a new business and kids start school now in a couple of days. Cannot believe the summer is already over. It's kind of scary, but it flies by.
I am digressing because I haven't been on here talking in a while for a while, but here we are and today's episode is gonna be a really good one, and it's something where I'm gonna share a little personal story with you about something that happened on our vacation. And it's all about playing the long game.
And how authentic relationships [00:03:00] can open doors that you never saw coming down the road.
So honestly, I think that this might be one of the most important things that I've learned in business. In life, and we're gonna talk all about the long game when it comes to relationships. And now when I say relationships, I am talking about the people in your world, the friendships that you have, the connections that you make, the friendships that you build, both in business and in your personal life.
And here's what I've noticed, most people don't really play the long game anymore. Because we live in a world of instant gratification. You know? Like we want the results and we want the results. Like yesterday, like why hasn't it happened? The patience piece, which is like the most important piece in terms of business, just is non-existent anymore.
It's ridiculous. respond to our email, if someone doesn't respond to our text, you know, we immediately think, oh, well, not worth my time. And if we don't see an immediate return from a new connection, we just [00:04:00] like move on to the next thing. A lot of times like people get caught in this trap where they're like, well, what's in it for me?
Which is the wrong trap to get into and listen. I get it. I get that we're all busy. There's no one here listening to this episode right now who can say that they are not busy. We've all got our own stuff going on. We all have our own businesses, our own families, kids, homes to take care of.
We gotta take care of our health. We gotta take care of our strength. We gotta take care of our mental health. I mean, the list goes on and on and on. So we're all busy, but. Here's the thing. Some of the best, biggest, most life-changing opportunities in my life have come from relationships that started years before.
I'm not talking just last year, I'm talking like relationships that have happened five, eight, and even 10 years earlier. one of the things that I've absolutely loved. Since becoming an online entrepreneur, which has been like 13 years now. Before this, I was a teacher for 10 years, but the best thing that I love so much is God.
The conversation is just so different. when you are meeting other entrepreneurs, the [00:05:00] conversation. Is next fricking level. They're not bitching about anybody. They're not gossiping, they're not talking shit. They're not having all this small petty talk. They're not talking all this negativity and all this, negative bull crap.
None of that exists. It's all about. Oh, let's share about what's working and what isn't working and where we're going and let's learn from each other and let's get excited for the future and let's live our best life and let's reach out full potential and like cheering each other on. And just the conversation is different.
And that's why I absolutely love getting in the rooms and going to these live in-person events, business events. I'm going to one next week actually in California that my business mentor's, hosting. But I love it because you're in a room with a couple hundred people, and guess what? Every single person in that room owns an online business.
And I'm talking, some of these people, I mean, they're up there. I'm like small fish in a big sea. Some of these people are making like $10 million a year, [00:06:00] $5 million a year, millions and millions of dollars a year. Extreme success The thing that I wanna share with you right now before I dive into this is that you should never be intimidated by somebody just because of the amount of money that they earn.
You should never let money scare you when you see someone or meet someone with. Success, any kind of success, whatever you consider to be success, that should be like your green light to be like, this is gonna be awesome. I wanna learn from this person. And it should open your eyes to possibility in the world because it doesn't matter how much money you earn, they're just a normal frigging person.
They're just people. It's a person who just decided to go for it, and they didn't overthink it and they didn't overanalyze it, and they didn't let people saying shit to them stop them. They just put their blinders on and they chased their fricking dream and they didn't stop. No matter how many hurdles they had to, you know, fall over, no matter how many times it didn't work, they just kept going because they saw where they were going.
And so that's one thing that I want you to realize is that. [00:07:00] These people who get to a certain level, they're no better than you. They're no different than you. They're not smarter than you. They just decided to go for it. And I learned that when I very first started in network marketing and I'm learning it now, uh, still years later, even after being involved, running my own online course and coaching others in online entrepreneurship with, in terms of mindset.
And so getting in these rooms with people like this is so, so, so important. Also too, I wanna say this too, because there's three different kinds of people here that I wanna talk about really quickly. So when you meet someone who's really successful or somebody tells you like, oh yeah, that person does this, and oh my God, they made like $30 million a year.
So you have three different kinds of people. You have the first person who's like scared shitless of that person. They're super intimidated. They can't even say hi, can't even talk to them because they're just like. I don't know how you could even talk to that person. I don't even, oh my God, I'm, I'm so scared to talk to them, which is a total missed opportunity, Because here's your opportunity to learn and grow and reach your potential. You're only gonna reach [00:08:00] it by being surrounded by other people who honestly are where you are not yet. That's how you get there. You don't get there by being the highest achiever in your circle. You don't, it doesn't matter. You can be like, well, I do this for my job and this is how much money I make.
I make the most amount of money out of all my friends. Well, that sucks because if you don't have a circle where there's nobody above you, you ain't growing. That's the bottom line. So you have that first person who's scared to talk to this person, and then you have the other person who sees that amount of money and obviously they're insecure and they get like annoyed and mad that this person has that success and they're just like, well, that person's nothing but a jerk.
Anyway. That person's just all about the money anyways. They're unethical and they don't even know them on a personal level. And then you have the other person who's just a normal friend. Who just sees it as, Hey, good for you. Like that is frigging awesome. I'm gonna cheer you on and show me the ways, like what did you do?
How did you get to where you are today? What were some of the struggles that you had to overcome? Like what was your hardest [00:09:00] challenge? Do you have any tips and suggestions? And then you bounce ideas off of each other. I tend to be that person right there where I am just so eager to learn. My husband's the same exact way, like we are so eager to learn.
From other people. It doesn't even matter what kind of business you're in, as long as you're a good person. That's the other thing I wanna say, because we all know those people and I've seen this play out right in front of my eyes before, but you have this really successful person, for example, and then you get these people who are just like drooling over them, hanging all over them, It's obnoxious. You know what I mean? Like, I wanna look at them and be like, seriously, can you cut the shit? This is a normal person. Can you treat them like a normal person? Can you stop being such a weirdo? Like, really? And so I think it's so important that when you are choosing who to bring into your circle and who to actually become friends with and build connections with, it doesn't matter how much money the person's earning, what matters most is, is this person a good person?
Is this person ethical? Is this person a good friend? Is this person going to be [00:10:00] supportive? Because I don't care how much money that you make, if you're an asshole, I don't want anything to do with you. Really. I don't. I want nothing to do with you. You could be making a hundred million dollars a year, and if you're a jerk, stay away.
I don't care. so I want you to remember that, okay? Like don't get so wrapped up in the money. Is the person a good person? Does this person make you feel better? Than when you started the conversation. Do you feel inspired and rejuvenated after hanging out with them? These kinds of things all make such a huge difference in the connections and the relationships that we build over time, and not just in business, but just in our personal life still.
some of these biggest opportunities, back to what I was saying before that have happened for my husband and I have been from true, authentic relationships that literally started 10 years ago. And the perfect example is something that honestly just happened like. I serious. It was like three weeks ago now.
So about eight years ago, Nick and I were hanging out on a playground on Annamaria, and we met a friend there for the first time [00:11:00] and he was there with his two, you know, kids. And we were just chitchatting. We knew nothing about anything. We were new. We had just, moved here to the island from Massachusetts.
I'm just off the island, not on the island. I would love to live on the island. Put it on the vision board and we were just chit-chatting just about life. We found out that our two kids were going to be in the same grade together. And so we were just talking. We were just talking about the island. We were talking about how we just moved from Massachusetts.
We were talking about the summer and starting school and normal conversations. He left, you know, his daughter forgot his flip flops, so Nick had a little simple text message back to him saying like, oh, by the way, like your daughter forgot the flip flops and sent a picture and.
Through the years , checking in every now and then saying, hi, how are things going? Happy birthday messages. Happy Father's Day messages. Congratulations on, this, that, and the other thing. If a restaurant opened up, we'd go there with our family, we'd support it.
We'd take pictures, we put it on social media. We'd tell all of our friends about it to try to drive more business to it. Now that's what. True friends do, right? They [00:12:00] support other people on their journeys. They get excited for them, genuinely excited for the success of other people, right? And just over the years we've stayed connected.
And so, yeah, it's been like eight years now. with no hidden agenda, we've watched his success grow exponentially, over the last eight years. But just being a normal friend to this person, normal friendship. next thing you know, fast forward to now this year, like three weeks ago, completely outta the blue.
He decides to call my husband when we're in North Carolina and say, Hey listen, I wanna start up a property management company in North Carolina, and I want you to run it with me. I want you to go in on this business with me. So let me just pause there for a second so that this sinks in.
Eight years later. Eight years of developing a true relationship with someone so that way he learns to trust us, know us, like us, and vice versa. This wasn't an overnight thing. It was [00:13:00] eight years in the making of showing up with no hidden agenda. Being there to support through the years being a normal human being, a normal friend.
And then all of a sudden, after the eight years of building trust, of showing up, of just being good people, the opportunity just kind of drops into our lap. That could be huge, not could be. It's going to be huge for our family and our future, It didn't come from chasing him down and being like, what can you do for me?
I need you to do this for me 'cause I need to make money and I wanna have more success like. That doesn't get you anywhere when you operate from that state of desperation and greed and like what's in it for me mentality that doesn't work completely backfires in your face. I think that is where so many entrepreneurs get it wrong and just people in general.
It doesn't even need to be someone who's running a business. We live in this very transactional networking world of like, well, I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine. And if there's nothing immediate in it for someone, [00:14:00] then they like disappear. They drop off the face of the fricking earth. And that is not how trust works.
That's not how trust is built. It's built over time. It's built in small, simple things. It's built in the check-ins, the support, the text messages outta nowhere, a genuine interest in somebody else's life. It's built by showing up without needing something in return or how about. Not even expecting anything in return.
You just do it because that's who you are as a person, because you're a good person and you expect nothing in return. This is just how you are. And you know, sometimes you might think, you know like, oh God, like why am I pouring so much into this person? I'm so busy, there's no benefit in it for me. Like I've heard people say that actually to me, but that is the wrong lens to be seeing this through because the benefit might not be obvious now.
But who knows? It might show up years later, and when it does, it can be life changing. Because guess what? If someone's gonna go [00:15:00] into business with you down the road, it's gonna be someone who knows you really well, who knows that they can trust you. Who knows that you're a friend who knows that you're gonna stick around through thick and thin, and that's only built through authentic relationships which happen over time.
here's what I want you to think about. Who are the people in your life right now who you genuinely enjoy, that you value, that you'd love to keep in your world? Even if there's nothing in it for you at this moment? You know what I'm talking about? Think about the people who you get together with and the conversation is like, awesome.
You feel good. You're talking about exciting things. You leave the conversation feeling energized and excited and pumped up and inspired and motivated, and like, that was a great time. I cannot wait to do it again. Who are those people? Those are the relationships that you need to keep investing in because you should protect your time.
You should protect your energy, and you should not let just any Tom, Dick, and Harry into your circle. I don't care how much money they make. You don't just. Invite [00:16:00] them in for the hell of it. If you're spending your time, your time is the most valuable asset that you have here on Earth.
And if you're gonna spending your time with someone, you better make sure that when you're done spending time with that person, it leaves you feeling better than when you started. Not worse. Those are the relationships to keep investing in. Send the text, make the phone call. Congratulate them when they have a win.
Share their posts. Ask about their kids. Be the person who shows up without a hidden motive. And I wanna give you just a little exercise here because you know that I love to make these episodes actionable. It's not just about listening. I say this all the time. You can sit here and be a sponge, and you can read all the PD books in the world, and you can listen to all the podcasts in the world and all the books on Audible.
But if you are not taking action after immediately listening or reading something. You're not gonna see the transformation in your life. The transformation comes from after taking in what you've learned, you now apply it to your life. So what I want you to do is I want you to make a list of five people that you haven't talked to in a while, but who you care [00:17:00] about, and I want you to reach out to them with no hidden agenda, no pitch, and just a genuine, Hey, I was just thinking of you.
I just wanted to say hi. Because guess what? No one does that shit, right. No one. Can you think of the last time somebody did that to you? We are so wrapped up in our own little worlds, right? And every now and then you might be like, oh shoot. Like I gotta reach out to this person. I haven't talked to 'em in so long.
I really miss them. And so if you are the type of person who actually carves out the time to send that genuine little, Hey, I was thinking of you message, it is gonna be so impactful to that other person on the other end, they're going to remember it forever because they're gonna be like, my God, like this person is so busy, I'm so busy.
They took the time to just say hi and check in on me. That's unheard of. No one does it be that person, right? Just be that person. And you never know. the simple act could be the start of something that really changes your entire trajectory of your life or your business years down the road just by taking that little extra step.
And again, it's about being a good, [00:18:00] authentic, real person. Someone who genuinely cares about people. Because here's the truth, and I really want you to remember this. Business moves at the speed of trust, and guess what? Trust takes time. You need to have patience. Trust is built over time. And if you're building a business and you want long-term success, you have to stop chasing only the quick wins and start planting seeds for the future because the people you invest in today could be the reason you get a phone call in like 2033.
That changes everything you don't know. Connections in life are everything. Relationships are the key to everything. So my challenge to you is to start playing the long game. Don't just think about the next 90 days, think about the next freaking decade, and in the meantime, I want you to enjoy those connections.
Make 'em real, have some freaking fun, make some awesome memories, have a great time because life and business [00:19:00] feel a whole lot better when you're surrounded by people who you actually truly like and trust. So that's it for today's episode, and if this message resonated with you, please share it with a friend.
Send this over to someone who you feel needs this reminder. And just remember, keep showing up, keep building those relationships and keep doing life big because that is what it's all about. We are not here to settle. We are not here to play small. You are not here to settle and to play small. You are here to live your very best life, to do life big, and I'm here to help you along the way also too.
If you really ready to go full throttle and wanna go all in, make sure you reach out. I have my Empowered Moms Business Circle Community Open. You get my Mindset Accelerator program completely for free, which is typically $997. When you become a member of our circle, and I have some awesome stuff in there.
You're gonna learn how to rewire your mind from more success and happiness. You're going to become a magnet to the things that you want in life. It's going to feel more effortless and we have some amazing people online entrepreneurs coming in, [00:20:00] doing some mentorship for you guys every single month. So get on in there.
I'll put the link in the show notes. But thanks so much for being here. You know I love you and I will see you the next time. Bye
